Introduction to the Blogger

My name is Kevin Finegan. I am 49 years old and am very happily married to Glenda and have a beautiful 18 year old daughter Jasmine. We live in Durban , South Africa.

My Blog is to articulate my experiences on my very unexpected Grief journey following the death of our Son, Darren, on 13 August 2017. It is written for my sanity, to express myself and hopefully heal and process my thoughts/feelings.

One thing my journey is teaching me is that Men and grief are complex companions. There are countless support groups for parents that have lost a child however I am yet to find one that has any men actually attending. My Dad committed suicide in 1996 and I really struggled post that to deal with it. I was told to be strong, I was the head of the house etc. As a 26 year old I saw that as not crying, not showing emotion, looking after the  ‘fragile ladies’ in my family. I bottled up most of my feelings until it nearly cost me my career and most frightening was it nearly cost me my marriage. I am hoping with Blog to help anyone on their journey realize we never get over it but we can get through it day by day together.

Love and light.

15 thoughts on “Introduction to the Blogger

  1. Well done Kevin. I hope that you will find healing in helping others deal with such an enormous loss and pain. Look forward to following your blog.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Well done on taking the time to open up about your past and your feelings. As a “man” this not always easy but you will inspire many to dig deep and hopefully join you on this journey. I don’t know your entire story and religious standing but I know you as a great man. A humble and committed man. I pray you find solace and peace and that you may transform the thinking of many out there

    Liked by 1 person

  3. It’s always best to express yourself. Our society’s archaic view that men have to be strong by not showing emotion leads to a lot of agressive behaviour and mental illness. This blog you are doing is inspiring Kev and very brave. Well done.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. My Boet. The losing of our beloved Darren has been a watershed for all our family and a Tsunami of epic proportions for you, Glenda and Jazzy. I salute your bravery and honour your heart. Much love. Twisted Sister. xxx

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Kevin words cannot express our sincere condolences and how proud we are of all three of you, such a strong family…if you ever just want to chat, give us a call…lots of love, Nev and Michelle


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